Saturday, September 29, 2012

I can not believe 2012 only has 3 months left! This year as flown by! It has been such an incredible year--ran my first half marathon, family vacation to Vegas, I managed a pool for the first time, I have found myself to be content and happy, I have grown closer to my family & so much more! But with all this 'living', some of my goals for 2012 have yet to be attained. I am in the 3 month stretch and have decided to take a look at what I wanted to accomplish before the end of the year & push myself to get there!
I haven't completely dropped the ball. Most things I have been doing but it is time to step it up!
I live by the 4 D's: Dedication, Desire, Devotion and Determination. So, tomorrow I prep and Monday October 1st, it is Operation 2012 Goals A-Go-GO!
{Copy of 2012 Goals.. I have typed in red the progress I have made. Not too shabby but I have alot of work ahead of me}.

I started another blog {} I have set goals on there & will be making a weekly plan to achieve those long term goals which are:
Here are my 2012 'Bringing Sexy Back' Goals:
Starting Weight: (eeeeeek) 180.7
Goal Weight: 135 (I want 130, I think 140 is a definite goal so I will
meet in the middle)
Lbs to lose per week: 2 lbs.
Goal Weight Date: June 1, 2012 (6 months)
Starting Pant Size: 12 (okay...I am pushing 14)
Goal pant size: 6
Size 10 by: February 20, 2012
Size 8 by: April 16, 2012
Size 6 by: June 1, 2012
Starting shirt size: Large-X Large
Goal shirt size: Small
Size L by: February 20, 2012
Size M by: April 16, 2012
Size S by: June 1, 2o12
I would also like to add three other bad items to the Physical list:
No more biting fingernails GREAT PROGRESS
No more pulling eyelashes {I know, horrible} 2 MONTHS PULL FREE :)
Floss Daily MUST DO
Live off the 80/20 Rule: {Live off of 80%. Give 10% to God. Give 10% to self (savings)} MUST DO
No Credit Card Debt CHECK :)
Pay off 1/4 of my student loan. IN PROGRESS
Read 1 book a month {12 books in a year}3 DOWN, 9 TO GO
Complete Personal Trainer Certification GOTTA WORK ON!
Keep CHES {Community Healthy Education Specialist} certification current CHECK :)
Write in journal (blog) weekly (minimum) HAHA, OBVIOUSLY NEED TO DO
Be prompt to everything I HAVE DONE OKAY ON THIS.
Improve on time management IMPROVEMENT
Learn guitar GOTTA DO!
Be a better friend, coworker, sister daughter, granddaughter, cousin, niece, citizen, auntie and most importantly, MAMA! ALWAYS TRYING!
Read Scriptures I'LL GIVE THIS A WHIRL. ;)
Meditate THIS IS A MUST!
It is never to late to be what you might've been. Cheers to the last 3 months of 2012!

Sunday, July 22, 2012

A Little Bit Stronger

Today, I grabbed what I thought was a blank journal to write in but what I grabbed was a journal I had started in 2009. It only has a few entries in it... written by a sad, confused, lonely girl who was so unsure of herself and her future and was in a relationship that was tearing her to pieces. Apart of me was embarrassed...for myself. That was who I was! A part of me wanted to burn those pages. All I could think of was, "How sad and pathetic." But than I came across a paragraph and I realized, this was who I was, who created who I am and I couldn't be more happy or more comfortable in my skin.

April 1, 2009 3:10am {37 days before Addilyn was born}

'I have feared being a single mom this entire pregnancy but I think it is about time I grasp reality and start planning for that. Babygirl, if you ever read this, please know that no matter what, you will always be my #1 and everything. If things don't workout for your father and I, please know I fought with all my might, heart and soul to keep our family together. Know that even before you were here with me that I put you first, before every decision I made. I seriously can't wait to meet you and hold you in my arms. I promise you I will always strive to be the best mommy I can be for you. And I promise, we will always be happy and I will do everything in my power to protect you from harm and heartache. I will be your best friend and I will never leave your side. Mommy loves you.'

{Tear jerker}

April 4, 2009 2:50am {33 days before Addilyn was born}

'I hate this method of falling and getting back up again and again but I know someday I will be up and looking back and these days of 'falling' and know it made me stronger.'

{And that, it did}

And to think, that was a YEAR before I finally built the courage to let go of those fears of being a single mom and move on from her father. Those were the hardest days of my life. I was so unhappy. I was clinging onto hope. My daughter was all I had. She was my inspiration. She gave me the strength to do the things I was so fearful to do. She continues to motivate me to do better.... BE BETTER! God knew I needed her. He sent her to me save me. She is my angel.

xoxo, Alex

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

D x 4

Is it really February? Did we skip January or did I blink? Time is FLYING!

Something about a new month that is so refreshing. It is like we get 12 "fresh starts' a year.

I have high hopes for this year! I feel like 2011 was all about overcoming barriers and settling in to a new life. 2012 feels like the year that I will be able to focus on perfecting certain areas of my life while continuing to learn and grow as I go along.

January was really good! I just can't get over how good life is right now. I had gone a few years that if I went a day without crying, it was a good week. Now, I can't remember the last time I cried. I feel so blessed. All the trials I have gone through have truly made me a better and much stronger person.

I am continuing to work on my 2012 goals.... slowly but surely. This month, I want to continue to work on them but with a little more energy and enthusiasm. It is all about time management! I need to be getting up a earlier, so I am not rushed for work and so I can have a little 'me' time before the crazy days start. I need to watch/listen to less TV shows on the computer. {I have created this habit of listening to talk shows on my computer while I clean and make dinner}. I need to spend more quality time with my daughter. I need to remind myself of my goals everyday so I can renew my commitment daily. I need to focus on the things that matter most and not stress about things I can't control. I have 29 days this month. I am revamped and feeling great about February!

{Bonuses: It is my niece's 1st Birthday on Valentine's day, I have a new Valentine this year, it is my parents 30th wedding anniversary and I get one extra day this month to make sure I get'er done!}
This month is all about the letter D: Dedication, desire, devotion and determination.
Goodbye January 2012... you were great. Hellllllo, February 2012.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

6 Months

When I went to Jr. Prom, I didn't pay much attention to the boy you was in the front and center of the picture. In fact, I didn't know who he was. Who would've thought 10 years later, I would be falling for that man.
{How we met... again.} It had been a year since I had been single. I had really learned to love my independence and time with my daughter. I had just started my new job as the Athletic Club Manager and I really didn't have time for a social life. I was content and happy. A mutual friend of ours kept inviting me to come hang out so finally I gave in. They were actually hanging out at his house. I walked in to a group of all guys {I seem to make friends with guys easily}. I made it clear to the person that had invited me that I did not want to be 'hooked up' with anyone & I just wanted to be treated like, "one of the guys." He was sitting across from me. I noticed him but I didn't think much into it. After chatting for awhile, he asked if I had dated someone in high school. I said yes. He than said, "I knew I recognized you. We were in the same prom group." I can barely remember yesterday, let alone a my Jr. Prom I went to 10 years ago!
I returned to hang with those guys for a few weekends. I would notice if he wasn't there but I still had no intentions of wanting to date anyone. When he was there, we would chit chat. I knew his brother so one day, I thought of a lame excuse, which I can't remember, to ask for his phone number. I ended up texting him one day and he text back. :) It was that 'twitter patted, can't stop smiling,' feeling. I felt like a teenager again!
{Smooches} A little over a month into it, we were hanging out one night with everyone. I decided it was getting late so I got up to go. He decided to walk me out this night. It was like high school all over again. The lame filler talk.... both a little nervous... and than fIrEwoRkS! We had our first kiss!
{First Date} Well, I guess you can say the kiss confirmed we were into each other, so the next day he called and asked if I wanted to go out with him the following weekend. We went to a movie and dinner, {I know... typical} but let's keep in mind I had not been on a date in years! It was so nice to go out and be treated like a lady.
{To be continued...} Who knows where this relationship will go. In the past, I would live for the future and dream of the wedding. Now? I am just enjoying dating my best buddy. He treats me so good. He loves my daughter. And we just get each other. I can be myself around him. He tells me I am pretty without makeup and when I get a little bitchy, he just lets me be and laughs at me later. He is patient, kind and caring. I guess you can say I am falling in love.
Okay, maybe I fell already.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

2012 Progress

It has been two weeks since I set my 2012 goals & I thought I would check in with myself & see where my progress has gone.
I have been doing GREAT in making a healthy lifestyle change! I have been exercising regularly, eating a balanced diet and drinking TONS of water.
I also have not bitten my nails or pulled my eye lashes! Wahoo!
However, I have not been flossing daily so I will focus on this.
Well, let's just say this year got off to a rough start. I had to replace all 4 tires, spending a lot of money I did not have. However, I did pay off the credit card I had put all of my holiday spending on. Because money has been tight, I have not been living off the 80/20 rule {live off of 80%, give 10% to God and 10% to myself}.
Perhaps I should start off small. I will start with 95/5 {live off of 95%, 2.5% to God & 2.5% to myself}. Once this seems easier, I will add on.
I did start to pay off my student loans and getting out of debt has been #1 on my mind.
I actually read an entire book, front to back! I read the Hunger Games and have started the second book in the series. {This is huge for me as I never read}.
My Personal Training Certification studying is non-existent. I will get this out today and set up a calendar for study dates.
I also need to call the CHES headquarters to see how I can keep my certification current.
And I have been doing great on keeping up with my blogs!
I need to work on being more prompt to things. Time management has gotten TONS better but can still use improvement.
Guitar is still dusty.
And I can ALWAYS work on being a better person {especially sister & friend & mostly mom}.
I have not been doing any of this & it is probably the most important!
I GOT TO do this!!
Well, so far, so good! I have made some great changes but still have lots to do! Everything that I bolded, I am going to really work on this week. I need to create habits & prioritize.
Excited to continue this journey on self improvement & discovery.

Friday, January 20, 2012



Love... No matter

I know I use this quote a lot but it seems to have a big impact in my life. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I am bold. I am a true believer that people cross each other paths for a reason. I may write something on my blog that may inspire someone. I may be open, sometimes raw but always honest.

My happiness for others is true and authentic. You put out positive energy into the universe and you will be surrounded by it. You can not trick the universe and write something positive and harbor bad feelings and think you will still be getting good in return.

I will continue to love hard. I will continue to forgive. I will continue to make mistakes and grow from them. I will not apologize for my happiness & love for others.

{Never sacrifice who you are because someone has a problem with it.}